When I first arrived here in The Netherlands, I had gotten a job at horse stable down south in the country. Over time I learnt that the family I worked for clearly had issues I didn’t want to get involved with. For my own sanity I had to find something else and after a few months I applied to university, and when I was accepted I lived close enough to move in with my boyfriend.
This study wasn’t really for me, too theoretical for someone who generally needs space, dialogue and use my hands. I got bored and I got exhausted from trying to be something I wasn’t.
Conveniently enough I got the opportunity to work in my moms accounting firm. I was now learning the same things I had tried studying, but while working with it, not just listening and reading. This was a completely different world in this way. To learn about how companies work, finance and the way of working start-to-finish, was something I enjoyed, for awhile.
I started up a web shop in February 2015. I had several trial and fails on the way, but by summer 2016 I was selling quite well. However when I got pregnant, and I was very sick I had to close it down. It never really got back up there again after, as with many other shops on this page, demand has gone elsewhere.
In 2016 my mom sold her company which left me unemployed. And while the lack of an extra income was something we needed to adjust to, I am happy that it allows me to spend all my time with our girls.
I have spent many days thinking and worrying about what I should do next, that I need a plan and been feeling rather restless since I at times feel stuck without a finished education nor a job, and there is no perfect plan to follow at this point.
However the conclusion I’ve some to is this: there is no point trying to FIND the perfect plan. If you expose yourself and show interest and keep an eye open and grab any opportunity that comes your way, the plan will find you. I’ve come so far in my life by doing just that. It might not have been a linear “perfect path” that so many dream of, where you get an education, job and the whole family package in one go. But my path has so far made me who I am today, and I think I am a kinder, more compassionate person now than if I had stuck around with my initial decisions. You grow when you take the chance to make a change.
At the end of the day, I truly believe that the most important is just to keep moving forward.
Don’t stress. Believe in yourself.
Draw your own perfectly imperfect life.
“Don’t wait for the right answer and the golden path to present themselves.
This is precisely why you’re stuck. Starting without seeing the end is difficult, so we often wait until we see the end, scanning relentlessly for the right way, the best way and the perfect way.
The way to get unstuck is to start down the wrong path, right now. […] You might not end up with perfect, but it’s significantly more valuable than being stuck. Don’t just start. Continue. Ship. Repeat.”
“When it feels scary to jump, that’s exactly when you jump. Otherwise you end up staying the same place your whole life. And that I can’t do”
– A Most Violent Year, J.C. Chandor